Gratitude with Attitude

On this day we are supposed to be extra thankful and share what we’re thankful for. The top of my gratitude list is pretty standard (family, friends, food, etc.) so I won’t repeat what you can get scrolling through Facebook, Twitter or Instagram. Let’s just assume I have all the same feels as everyone else. Instead, here are the things for which I’m grateful that never get mentioned.

Long underwear. When it’s 23 degrees during your morning walk, that shit makes a difference. I forgot it yesterday and remembered it today, and it was nice to be able to actually feel my legs at the end of my walk. You rock, long underwear.

People who will eat the first pecan pie you’ve ever made in your life and then tell you it’s delicious, when there’s no way you’ll ever know for sure since you don’t like pecan pie. Those people are solid. And quite possibly excellent liars.

DJs who play good rock music on Thanksgiving, instead of being like the asshole who decided to go on a five minute harangue about how hard it must be for people who have lost someone they love recently, maybe someone you’ve known a long time…or even your entire life, and then rambles about the void that’s left when someone is gone. I couldn’t punch the station change button fast enough. Thank God for the genius at KSHE who played Adam Sandler’s Thanksgiving Song. You, my friend, are amazing.

Jeans with spandex. I don’t think I need to expand on that one. Pun intended, naturally.

Heated seats and air conditioned seats that are the same seats. Because when you live in St. Louis and the temperature fluctuates between 23 degrees and 60 degrees on the same day, it’s nice to be able to heat and cool your booty as needed. No shivers, no swamp ass. Winner.

Bacon. Which should be assumed and for which I am grateful every day.

Netflix that allows me to watch the Thanksgiving episodes of The West Wing without leaving my couch, unlike in the old days when I would have to get up, walk eight feet to the DVD player, and switch out discs. Oh, the hardships of those days.

Interesting podcasts that keep me so preoccupied I don’t realize that I’m walking four miles in 23 degrees.

Flavored coffee creamer, which makes coffee not taste like something I’d use to degrease auto parts.

Wow, everyone is right. Gratitude sure does feel good! Happy Thanksgiving, lovely readers.

#blog#gratitude#personal essay#thanksgiving#writing

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